Conversations: What’s it all about?

CONVERSATIONS: What’s it all about?

Photo:  Sasha Korper and daughter Taiga

Photo: Sasha Korper and daughter Taiga

CONVERSATIONS: What’s it all about?

Conversations with my Daughter.  My eldest daughter Taiga and I grew up together. When she turned 25, the two of us celebrated by taking a road trip to Quebec City. Many chats ensued along the way: about love, food, fashion, and life in general. We decided it would be fun to write about it; the sometimes absurd, often enlightening, occasionally painful but mostly deeply satisfying conversations we share as we continue on this journey of becoming ourselves, together.

My experience of parenting is that, while it isn’t always easy, it is full of joy. And making the conscious effort to be a better parent offers us infinite opportunities for growth, so while I may have been my kids’ first teacher, I’ve also tried to be their best student. Sometimes the learning curve has been steep. There have been stumbles, mistakes made, even regrets. I know that my personal development — like that of all parents — has come at a price my children have had to pay. As my childhood BFF reminded me a while back, “Our first-born is always a grand experiment.” We do our best, but there will inevitably be failures. Such is the stuff of growing up together. I’m grateful every day for Taiga’s part in all this. Not only does she help me be a better parent, she helps me become a better person.  I hope that shining a light on the intricate workings of our mother  / daughter bond provides a little insight into your own parenting relationships, or at the very least offers up a few laughs along the way.

I’m excited about sharing these conversations with you.

Conversations with my Mother.  When I turned 25 my mother and I went on a birthday adventure, spending four straight days doing our favorite thing: shopping. Our arms exhausted from the weight of many bags, we would stop to rest at a café, order something full of sugar, and talk. At first we discussed the delicious cheeses or the amazing sales, but eventually our conversations waded into deeper waters, to our individual beliefs, heartbreaks, and forks in the road. Over those four days I learned about my mother as a person beyond our relationship. It was sobering to realize that when she turned 25, she already had me.

At 25, my biggest concern is whether or not I can squeeze one more pair of shoes onto my VISA. I kill plants. I still think applesauce is dinner.  At my age, my mother was responsible for a small child 24 hours a day — no returns, no refunds. I find the concept of parenthood baffling.At 25 I still have lots to learn, and I can only imagine that my mother felt the same way at this age. Uncertain as she may have been, she always treated me as her friend. She listened to all my schoolyard woes with a sympathetic ear and fostered in me the warm sense of belonging that comes from being allowed to sit at the Grown-ups’ Table long after bedtime, albeit in your jammies.

When faced with any life-altering question – like whether new shoes are, in fact, a more important purchase than this week’s groceries – my mother and I have found that between the 25-year difference in our perspectives and our 25 years together, a reasonable answer can almost always be found.You’d be surprised how rarely that answer is ‘buy the shoes.’

Author: Sasha Korper and Taiga Lipson

As an agent of change and creator of opportunities for inspiration, Sasha likes to support others in their quest for 'Ah-ha' moments. She's a Yoga Alliance certified Vinyasa teacher and intuitive coach, helping folks clear away false beliefs and mistaken identities to regain their personal power and realize their dreams. When she's not (literally) mucking about in the pottery studio, she enjoys skiing, gardening and hanging out with her two awesome daughters. Taiga is a writer and curator for a contemporary art gallery in Toronto. She enjoys strong coffee, reality TV, bunnies, and overstuffed armchairs. Her lifelong dream is to have ‘Sandwich Overlord’ printed on her business card. She wishes she were slightly taller, slightly thinner, and had a larger Visa limit.

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